Educating Americans

1. Please hope that your child doesn't require a special diet.
2. If he does require a special diet, please have a sense of humor.
3. If you fail the sense of humor requirement, have patience.

It's not that Ryley has serious diet limitations, he's just lactose intolerant. In general he can have a splash of 1% on his cereal but downing a carton of milk at lunch is pretty much a no no.

The way the school system works these days, if he wants to have pig in a blanket at school along with his classmates instead of PB&J from home, the lunch ladies are required to put a carton of milk on his tray. I've paid for it, fair enough. The problem is really the chocolate milk. It's like heroin for a 6 year old with lactose issues. He can't say no and they offer it as an option. Because I know he has a problem, I have a couple of options.

1. I can send him with PB&J every day and listen to him whine.
2. I can have him come up with a solution to the "milk problem".

Ryley's rather fantastic solution is that on the days he wants to eat at school, he takes a juice box from home. Awesome.

We tried to execute this plan in the last week but it's more difficult than it would appear.

The lunch ladies get pretty irritated if you rock the boat. They have to put that carton on his tray. The only way they won't is if you send a doctor's note to school indicating his "special diet". I don't know about anyone else but I'm not about to take my kid to the doctor just so I can tell the doctor that milk gives my kid the runs and the doctor can write a note. Kids, that's $100. No thanks. Try explaining that one to the school system. They must think we all run off to the doctor the moment our kids sneeze. Not in my house.

I talked to his teacher at length about this yesterday since she called me about it. She talked to the head lunch lady and emailed me to let me know that he could take his own juice but that they would have to put the milk on his tray until such time I provide a note about his special diet.

Fine. I told Ryley he had to take the milk but he didn't have to drink it and I don't want him to drink it. He got it.

Today the school nurse calls me because his teacher asked her to. Guess why. She had to ask me for the note from the doctor about his special diet.

And Ryley's teacher thinks he's the one with ADHD.

Didn't we just clear this up yesterday?!?!? Why is this so difficult and why are we wasting so much time over a carton of milk? I think the nurse got it but I'll probably get a call from the principal tomorrow.